Camping in Ukraine
by quietlyfangirlinginthecorner
Summary: Roderich's stag party has been organized by Gilbert and Feliciano, as a result Roderich and some friends and acquaintances have been taken to Ukraine to go camping...not Roderich's favorite thing Whilst there Ludwig meets a slightly scary girl who appears to be the only sane person on the continent contains Germarus, AusHun Spamano and whatever my fangirl mind comes up with
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own Hetalia...I'm very sorry...this will probably be very _very_strange...Are you happy now Taka, I have written it MUAHAHAHA**

Ludwig didn't need a holiday and he hadn't been working any harder than usual, although many of his friends pointed out that he worked harder than most normal people when he was being lazy.

The holiday had been Feliciano's idea, Feliciano was Ludwig's best friend and had taken it upon himself to organize a holiday of sorts; Technically it was more of a stag party than anything else because their friend Roderich was getting married and as a result planning was down to the excitable Italian...because Gilbert, who was supposed to be the best man was unsure of where to go...or rather he was having trouble coming up with plans that were acceptable, so Feliciano was called in to help Gilbert along.

So essentially Ludwig was being forced into going on holiday to Ukraine, a destination which had been picked by Feliciano by closing his eyes and jabbing his finger somewhere on the map.

The worst bit about the holiday in Ludwig's opinion was that Feliciano's brothers were going, he didn't have a problem with Marcello aside from the almost constant flirting what he had a problem with was Lovino spewing insults at him...he could deal with it and it wasn't something that kept him up at night but it wasn't very nice and a week of hearing nothing but swearing wasn't exactly appealing.

It wasn't even Feliciano who wanted him to go, it was Antonio, a friend of Roderich's who also happened to like Lovino...he didn't know it but everyone else had...or had been told by Elizaveta that was what was happening.

Antonio had refused to go unless Lovino went too because otherwise he'd be all alone.

And that was why Ludwig was in a plane trying to get some paper work done whilst his brother and Feliciano had a game of eye spy...the only thing either of them had "spied" so far were clouds.

He could hear Lovino and Antonio talking avidly about tomatoes or something, Francis and Marcello were having a flirting competition, from what Ludwig could hear, it was 6:5 to Francis.

Roderich was sat next to Arthur a few seats forward with his face in his hands...Roderich wasn't sure he knew half the people who Gilbert and Feliciano had invited and he was dreading the week ahead.

* * *

two cars, two cars were not enough to transport the entirety of the group to the hotel...a child would have known that.

"Who the fuck let my brother book the cars" Lovino growled

"There are ten seats," Ludwig reasoned "There are eleven of us..."

"We could always shut one of you Bastards in the boot" Lovino grinned, glaring at Ludwig as he did so.

Ludwig frowned at the group of jet lagged men and sighed "someone needs to share a seat belt"

Antonio's hand shot up in the air "I'll share, Lovi, come and sit with meeeeee!" he cried, holding out his arms, Lovino simply raised his middle finger in response.

Ludwig shook his head "the two smallest people should, Vash and Marcello"

Lovino punched the air in triumph, Vash and Marcello looked horrified.

* * *

Marcello was sat with his eyes shut next to Vash. "What are you doing?" Vash hissed

"Trying to imagine you're a girl," Marcello replied casually "Now shhhhh, or the illusion will be shattered"

Romano swatted at them from the passenger seat "Shut the fuck up and take a damn siesta"

Ludwig was sandwiched between Vash and Arthur, trying to ignore Feliciano's blatant disregard for the laws of the road.

By some miracle or another Marcello had actually done as Lovino had told him and was now snoring loudly, leaned against Vash who was trying to push him into the window.

Vash hadn't wanted to go in the first place, he used to be Roderich's best friend but they hadn't spoke much in the past few years, it had been Vash's little sister who persuaded him to go, something about her pen friends being in the area...but Vash was _not _happy about leaving his precious baby sister with Elizaveta for the next week.

* * *

The land scape was pretty, nestled in amongst some mountains...but Ludwig wasn't looking at the village, he was stumbling out of the car along with Arthur and Vash, holding in vomit because none of them were used to Feliciano's dangerous driving.

The older two of the Italian siblings were squabbling about how to get the still sleeping Marcello out of the car.

Eventually it was agreed that Lovino would be the one to get Marcello out, meaning that Feliciano ran over to greet Gilbert leaving Lovino to shout and scream insults at no one in particular.

Ludwig was planning on helping the smaller man heave his teenage brother out of the car, but then Lovino opened the door and let his brother fall out with a squawk, still being held in the car by his seat belt.

Ludwig considered going to see if Marcello was alright, but then the yelling started and he decided that anyone who could swear that loudly was not in any need of urgent medical attention.

Ludwig instead turned his attention to the hotel, or rather the house that they were stood outside of.

A woman with short blonde hair bustled out of the house with a nervous smile on her face.

"Hello, my name is Katyusha, can I speak to Feliciano Vargas please?" she announced, looking very nervous.

Feliciano pushed forward with a grin on his face, "I'm Feliciano, pleased to meet you in person Signorina Braginskaya"

the Ukrainian smiled softly before gently shaking his hand, "It's nice to see you too, do you need to be shown how to use the fire?"

Feliciano shook his head "There's no need for you to worry," he winked "We'll be fine"

Katyusha nodded and headed into the house "Let me know if you need anything" she called.

After that things moved quickly, although Ludwig didn't like not being in control of the situation, but it appeared that having Feliciano and Gilbert in charge wasn't as bad as he thought it would be, they'd been in Ukraine for a few hours and no one except Marcello had been injured.

The group were led through the forest, up a hill, down a hill and then to a field containing a number of yurts (Awesome tent things).

Roderich made a strangled noise "You've taken me camping!"

Feliciano shook his head "no, not camping, _glamping_" he protested

Roderich frowned "will there be bugs in the tent?"

"well...yes, but it's not a tent..."


	2. Chapter 2 The breakfast angel

**I still don't own Hetalia, thanks for reading sorry this took so long, I had writers block (mostly because I had too much drawing inspiration...sorry.  
**

The first night of camping hadn't gone very well, everyone was too jet lagged to speak civilly.

Gilbert took a running jump onto his bed...which turned out to be as hard as iron if the thud and the yelp was anything to go by.

Then it transpired that despite Feliciano's assurances to Katyusha...none of the men had mastered fire, apart from Ludwig and Vash who (like everyone but Feliciano and Gilbert), had no idea that they were going camping and as a result hadn't brought strike fires with them.

So they'd had to send Gilbert who drew the short straw, to go down to Katyusha's house and wake up the entire household, he returned with Ivan, Katyusha's younger brother.

And then just as everyone was getting comfortable in their beds, Roderich started screaming...apparently a spider had crawled onto his face.

The morning wasn't much better, Feliciano had left his shoes outside over night, in that time all the slugs in the area had converged on his trainers, the first anyone knew of it was when Feliciano shrieked and threw his shoes into one of the yurts, they landed on Arthur who then began yelling and then just to make things perfect Katyusha arrived to tell them that breakfast was ready if they wanted it.

Ludwig picked up Feliciano's slug filled trainers and put them outside, because he didn't even want to think about what would happen if Roderich found one in his sleeping bag, it seemed as though he was there more as a babysitter than as Roderich's cousin.

The group traipsed down to the house, several of them complaining about the ridiculously early hour (mostly Lovino).

Ludwig was about to knock on the door as common curtousy dictated, however Gilbert simply threw the door open announcing that their 'most awesome guest' had arrived with 'these ass holes' Roderich visibly flinched at the sheer rudeness of their arrival while apologizing profusely.

The dining room had several clusters of wooden tables and various mismatching chairs next to the kitchen from which there came an amazing smell.

The group settled themselves in various seats, with Arthur being very unsure of where to sit seeing as he knew only four of the people there and of those he hated two and barely remembered the others because they only ever went drinking together; Ludwig had a much more easy time, sitting between Feliciano and Gilbert (because some one had to keep them under control).

Arthur eventually decided to sit alone but was rescued by Lovino who vocalized his opinion that Antonio was an idiot while Arthur agreed which somehow resulted in the pair sitting together.

After a while of sitting together and chatting noisily Katyusha arrived to take some breakfast orders

"Just so you know, if you're ever hungry my kitchen is always open to you" she smiled as she walked back towards the kitchen. Arthur looked as though all of his Christmases had come early.

They waited for their meal to be cooked, still talking amongst themselves.

But when the food came it wasn't the caring Ukrainian who carried the trays but what looked like an angel with a surprisingly angry look upon her face. She had pale blonde hair and wore a dark blue dress with a white apron.

Marcello's face lit up when he saw her, he leaned back casually clicking his fingers; "Ciao bella-"

"No" replied the girl firmly before virtually throwing the plate of food at him. Marcello smiled and shrugged his shoulders "worth a try".

Ludwig received his food which looked as though it had been in some kind of serious accident, the meal actually looked like it should belong in an appeal. "Thank you" he said calmly, the girl grunted in response before skulking back to the kitchen muttering something in a language Ludwig didn't understand.

Ludwig gazed at her as she managed to stomp off gracefully; the scraping of a chair shook him from his daze, he turned to see Gilbert staring at him while resting his face on one hand "What the fuck was that?"

Ludwig looked at his brother "what?"

Gilbert smirked "you liiiiiiiiiiike her"

Ludwig flushed "I can't make a judgement I don't know her" he replied, Gilbert chuckled

"Oh no, I'm your brother I can tell!" he laughed "oh this is brilliant! West likes the waaaaaaitreeeess!"

Lovino grimaced from across the table "Oh gross, poor girl"

Feliciano punched Lovino on the arm "Don't be mean to him, I think it's sweet"

Lovino rubbed his arm "you would do" he snapped.

Ludwig decided to ignore them and eat his breakfast.

* * *

Natalia was furious, she didn't want to be working at her sister's stupid hotel thing. She only worked there to keep an eye on her brother, which was _not _creepy no matter what her friends said (most of her friends, Yong Soo never said a word against her hobby, sometimes he helped her) the thing she hated more than anything else at that moment in time was the _stupid _stag party that was happening, she hated that.

And Katyusha made her serve the breakfasts AND give them to the guests! Honestly, it was like she was a waitress or something...wait.

She checked the list she had in the back of her notebook, the kept it so she'd know what to expect when she had to work; She ticked the different types of person

_Loud Mouth guy- 2 _She'd met two ridiculously loud people, one with white hair and the other with spiky blonde.

_Annoyingly cheerful- 1 _The ridiculously cheerful one had immediately started stealing tomatoes off of other people's plates and had the nerve to tell her to have a good day.

_Flirty without cause- 2 _One had blondey brown hair, an Italian accent and a weird curl, The other had longish blonde hair and had merely winked at her but that had been enough to annoy her.

_Hyperactive?-1 _Another one with a strange curl, who had got on her nerves.

_Moody-3 _Yet another weird curl boy, this one had stole the tomatoes off of the annoyingly cheerful one's plate. Another of the moody ones had MASSIVE eyebrows and was yelling at one of the flirty without cause ones. And the last was less moody and more exasperated, he just sat there like he hadn't had a wink of sleep while looking at the food she presented him with like it was some kind of garbage.

And then lastly

_Requires more observation- 2 _one with longish blonde hair and a frowny face but not in a moody way (he looked familiar) and then there was a man with his hair gelled back.

As the group of men left a man walked towards her (one of the requires more observation ones) he was the shorter of the two and he was holding a photo. "Hello, is your name Natalia Alfroskaya" he asked

she scowled an nodded.

"My name's Vash Zwingi, you write to my little sister, her name's Lili" he replied. Natalia remembered Lili, she'd been assigned her as a pen-pal at school and they'd decided to continue writing after the assignment finished; Despite the four years between them they got along very well. Natalia vaguely remembered that she'd mentioned an older brother who she worried about.

"It's nice to meet you" she muttered.


	3. Chapter 3 skiing

**Sorry this took so long (I had exams and writer's block) Thanks for reading and Taka...I said I'd write more ^_^**

As it turned out, Vash had been given more instructions from Lili than to simply say hello to Natalia. He'd been told to give her some photos and that years Christmas present (Which Lili didn't manage to send in time) The present was a stack of CDs by various bands which she'd expressed an interest in. It may be surprising but Natalia hadn't even listened to metal until she started writing to Lili. And then Vash was dragged away because the men were going skiing that day. Looking at them Natalia thought that watching them ski would be hilarious. The ones with the weird curls were _not _dressed for snow, they seemed to think that there would be a hoard of fashion conscious photographers out on the slopes lying in wait to take photos of them. The happy without cause one with brown hair who seemed to have made it his life's duty to further aggravate the grumpy curl brother (she assumed the ones with curls were related) wasn't dressed for snow either, although he didn't appear to have had fashion on his mind when he got dressed that morning.

Very few of them looked prepared for snow apart from Vash, one of the flirts (The blonde one) and the one with slicked back hair. She over heard the one with massive eyebrows saying that the snow where he was from was awful, half an inch deep my God how did he cope!

Katyusha tapped her on the shoulder "Thanks for helping, I'll do the washing up, Yong Soo is waiting outside for you!"

Yong Soo was Natalia's best friend, he was the only person who really understood her feelings towards her brother, sometimes they followed him together. Apart from that they had literally nothing in common. Natalia trotted over to the door and opened it. "Hello"

Yong Soo grinned at her "Hey Natalia, I'm bored and Yao kicked me out. Are you guys still serving breakfast?" and with that he pushed past her and strolled into the kitchen with a cheery "Hey Kat, your breasts originated in Korea, whoa sorry Sadik I didn't see you there"

Natalia forced down a smile and followed her friend.

* * *

Ludwig thought that even Gilbert knew that the skiing idea was a bad one. Few of the group had brought practical clothing, Gilbert and Feliciano were the only ones with an earthly clue of what was going on. So Ludwig had bundled himself up in as many clothes as humanly possible and followed his cackling brother out to the cars.

Once again Vash and Marcello were stuck sharing a seat belt, The pair weren't the best of friends, which mostly had something to do with Marcello having taken Lili out to the cinema and returning her ten minutes past her curfew (seven o-clock in the evening) in which time Vash had contacted the police and called up a search party. Ludwig remembered it vividly because Feliciano and Lovino had been frantic because they automatically assumed that if Lili was missing so was Marcello, He'd had to deal with the pair of them having a monumental freak out and then had to inform them that their brother was safe seven minutes later when Vash called again. They were squabbling now. Ludwig made a dash for the drivers seat but was shoved out of the way by Lovino who was beaming wildly. At which point Vash made a desperate bid for freedom because no one wanted to be in a car with one of the Vargas brothers behind the wheel. Antonio took a running leap into the passenger seat...it appeared that someone didn't mind. Ludwig tried to casually walk over to the car which Arthur was driving, but Feliciano grabbed his arm "You're sitting with us, right?" he asked.

Ludwig had never been able to say no to his friend's puppy dog eyes.

"Ja, I'm sitting with you" he sighed, rubbing his temples.

"Good, can you help me catch Vash so we can leave?" Feliciano smiled.

* * *

Yong Soo was now tucking into a massive plate of breakfast, this happened fairly regularly, he just showed up at their house and ate all their food. Sometimes Natalia wondered why they were friends. "Tali, do you have any more sausages?" He asked through a mouthful of food.

"Not for you we don't" She replied sharply. Yong Soo's face fell a mile.

* * *

Ludwig had been right, the skiing had been a metaphorical blood bath. Roderich had been the first to go. He had some how managed to come loose from his skis and slid along on his front, effectively ruining his jumper lovingly knitted by his fiance, with the words I heart Yaoi on the front (It had originally been knitted by Lizzie for Lizzie...but it had turned out too big for her and had been claimed by Roderich...he still didn't know what it meant. All Ludwig knew was that it made Kiku double over from laughter every time he saw it) The final straw was when Gilbert careered into Vash (the only one of the group who actually knew how to ski) causing him to crash into Francis who grabbed hold of Antonio to steady himself but instead dragged him down with him, Antonio brought Lovino to the floor with the rest of them. The Italians present were all shivering anyway because they placed fashion higher than warmth. Ludwig wished he could have been angry with Feliciano but they'd been friends for too long for him to manage that.

Gilbert threw an arm around Ludwig's shoulder "So, you gonna talk to that blonde girl?"

Ludwig felt his face redden "No"

Feliciano, who seemed to have some kind of gossip radar (possibly concealed within his curl) appeared beside Gilbert "You mean the pretty one that Ludwig likes?" he grinned.

"Ja, that one" Gilbert replied.

Feliciano and Gilbert gave each other matching (admittedly very scary) smiles.

"You should talk to her, you like her, OH We can help, can't we Gilbert!" Feliciano rambled

Gilbert pretended to flick his hair over his shoulder "Yes, we are the best with girls out of everyone here, after all"

Ludwig frowned "I thought that was Marcello, Gilbert, you cried when you found out Liz was female and Feliciano, actually...I don't know about you"

Lovino strolled past "Feliciano fell in a bin while trying to impress a girl last Tuesday"

And then Ludwig as off the hook, Feliciano started whining at Lovino about how "pinky swears mean you don't reveal your brother's secrets!"

Ludwig let out a sigh and stepped towards the cars. "Where do you think you're going?" Grinned Gilbert. Shit.


	4. Chapter 4 Cleaning

**I was locked in the car in the rain for about an hour and it gave me time to plan fanfiction. I'm sorry this took so long, I'm trying to get used to writing for Germany and Belarus (because Spamano is easier to write) Thankyou for reading an reviewing and such ^_^**

Ludwig had managed to escape talking to his frankly insane brother when there was an outraged shriek from one of the cars, apparently Arthur didn't want to travel in the same car as Francis. Ludwig wasn't sure why on earth those two argued and he didn't waste any more time pondering as he dived into the same car as Roderich. He decided against running into the same car Feliciano was in because he was being nosy too.

What Ludwig hadn't factored in was the conversation he would have with his cousin who was also sharing a car with Arthur, Mathias and Francis. The conversation drifted to cooking, Ludwig liked cooking and he prided himself on some of the things he could bake however this cooking conversation turned sour the moment Arthur's culinary skills came into question thanks to Francis.

"My scones are delicious!" Arthur exclaimed folding his arms and hitting Francis with a glare that dared him to say otherwise, apparently the dare worked.

"Your scones taste bland and disgusting" Francis replied with a grin, Ludwig knew how this would end, it would end the way all of Arthur and Francis' arguments ended, in either tears or swearing.

"My Mum gave me that recipe!" Arthur spat furiously

"Your Mother was a lovely woman, but her cooking was almost as bad as yours" Francis retorted

Arthur attempted to slap at Francis from his seat next to Mathias, Francis followed suit and the pair of them were a squabbling mess on the back seat as the unfortunate Dane grimaced and did his best to stay out of reach.

Ludwig decided that his time would be better spent looking out of the window, he knew that trying to wade into the argument going on in the back of the car was a lost cause at best and a death wish at worst. The car journey was over more quickly than he thought it would have been and by the looks of things everyone was about ready to collapse. They made their way back up to the yurt.

The group fell asleep almost immediately, Ludwig hadn't even noticed he'd gone to sleep until he felt Arthur shaking him awake. Arthur seemed to have taken it upon himself to take on the parental role and was informing them that he'd cooked dinner and that they were expected to eat it. Ludwig dragged himself out of bed, he was usually very good at waking up of a morning but this was the early evening and he wasn't used to sleeping during the day.

He stepped out into the sunlight. Mathias was rubbing the dust from his eyes, Feliciano, Marcello and Lovino (who were all used to sleeping during the day) looked about ready to kill someone and Francis was looking a little green.

"Are you okay?" Ludwig asked

Francis pulled a face "Arthur made dinner, nothing will be okay for the next fortnight!"

Gilbert appeared behind Francis and grimly nodded in affirmation, he was a drinking buddy of Arthur and could remember one of his 'fry ups' from the morning after one of their adventures.

* * *

Dinner was an unmitigated disaster, Marcello was the first to go, the teenager hadn't heard the rumours about the Englishman's cookery and had only ever ate his brothers cooking before. Francis had built up a resistance from knowing Arthur and his family from childhood. After Marcello left the table things took a negative turn and eventually the dinner table was empty apart from Arthur who was wondering why he was left alone.

Ludwig managed to stagger back towards the kitchen to help Arthur clean up, he didn't think he could just leave the man, not every one shared his sentiments and he was convinced that his brother had left through a window.

"I'll help you clean" Ludwig stated, leading the way to the kitchen.

Arthur grumbled a little as he hurried after him "I don't need any help, I made the mess and I'll clean it up"

And then Ludwig saw the state the kitchen was in, flour had managed to go everywhere, sauce splattered every available surface and he didn't even want to go into the insane amount of washing up that was piled up beside the sink.

"You can't clean this alone" Ludwig stated his eyes widening at the sight of the kitchen before him.

Arthur frowned "I made it on my own"

The pair had started to clean when Lovino poked his head around the door "Oi, Bastard"

both men turned around "Not you, Bastard, Eyebrows there" Lovino added.

Arthur heaved a sigh "I'll help when I come back" he followed Lovino out of the door.

Ludwig looked at the scene of devastation that surrounded him, he let out a low groan and picked up a cloth, washing the dishes would be a good start and then he could get the walls, the surfaces and OH GOD! The ceiling? What had Arthur done?

* * *

Natalia and Yong Soo arrived back home, they'd gone to Raivis' house to kill a few hours. She liked the kid, he was a few years younger than she was but he shared her interest in the supernatural along with her taste in books, needless to say Yong Soo had got bored out of his mind while waiting for them to stop talking about ghost ships.

Yong Soo automatically made his way to the kitchen, Natalia wondered how he still had room to eat after the amount Yao fed him every day. He threw the door open and froze "Wow" he murmured

Natalia caught up to him and saw what was left of the kitchen "Fuck" she whispered to herself, and right in the centre of the room scrubbing the floor furiously was one of the men from that morning. She remembered him briefly as a serious person who was a bit red at times. "What happened here?" she asked, her sister was mild mannered most of the time but Natalia doubted that even the sweet natured Katyusha could forgive the state the kitchen was in.

"A member of our party cooked dinner, he'll be back shortly" the man replied, judging by the accent he was German or from around that sort of area.

Natalia picked up a cloth and set to work scrubbing a surface, she wasn't doing it for him, she was doing it so that she wouldn't have to re-do it later.

Yong Soo frowned for a few moments before rolling his eyes and half heartedly rubbing the counter with a cloth.


End file.
